TOUGH MUDDER EXTRAS...

Just for fun, a few more shots from the event, and a link to the official video. :)

So happy at the START line!

"Not the face!"

"Forget it! Just go faster!

"What the...!!! That kind of sucked...!"

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!

"We have to what? Ohhh... that guy just got pwnd..."

RaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaWWWWWRRRRRR!!!!

(This picture is now famous on Pinterest....haha)

"Well, I never!"

THE TOUGH MUDDER

Known as the "toughest event on the planet," with the tag line of "because marathons are boring," the Tough Mudder is based off of an obstacle course that was created by British Special Forces and is completed by thousands of crazy people all over the United States yearly. The specific event I participated in was located at Vail Lake, near Temecula California and was about 11 miles long which included 21 different obstacles. The "shock and awe" obstacle being the finale, an electric gauntlet of peril as well as 12 foot walls, log carries, dramatic jumps off platforms into water and crawling through itty bitty trenches and beneath barbed wire.

Quite a few folks run this event in teams, but there is a credo you recite at the start of the race which basically says you will help your fellow Mudders tackle the obstacles, that it's not about time, and you'll be willing to assist others when they need it, carry the wounded, etc.  I couldn't resist the call to glory long ago when I heard about this event.  It not only sounded fun, it sounded like a great challenge.  I am very pleased to report it was everything I had hoped and more fun that I had dared to imagine.

This event was, in summary, a giant adventure playground for adults.

THE EPIC TRAINING

Before I go into the details of my race experience, I must first take a moment to talk about the training I was a part of before the event even began.  A friend of mine found out I was signed up for the Tough Mudder "all on my lonesome" and hooked me up with an incredible pack of women who were doing the same race (one day earlier) as a group.  They are all part of a local Roller Derby team, the Mission City Brawlin' Betties.  These ladies are rockin' badass fabulous, and I'm forever grateful that I had a chance to meet them and train for this crazy race with them.  They raced as "Team Pretty."  It took me a little while to get used to their "derby names" but before I knew it I was on the phone with my Mom saying, "Oh yeah so tomorrow I'm carpooling up with Havoc, Misfit and Queefie to Crissy Bang-Bang's Dad's house so he can kick our asses up and down some gnarly hills."  Bang-Bang's Dad has property in the Middle-of-Nowhere National Park (okay, Los Olivos) where he trains students in Aikido.  For the love of his daughter and her team (and tag-alongs like myself) he took 3 weekends to get us ready for the big race and let all of us pay him in the form of pie and beef jerky.

I must admit, that man got the best of me.  Not only did we do crab walks, hill runs, log carries, Aikido strengthening, crazy push-ups and hundreds of jumping jacks, the final session we did all of that while he sprayed us down with a garden hose.  Let me tell you, after training with him I felt VERY prepared for ANYTHING.  At one point, lying on my back in the dirt and thistle, holding my legs 6 inches off the ground, then 12 inches, then  back to 6 trying to count to ten and getting gallons of water spurted up my nose, sputtering and shivering, the thought did cross my mind that I was indeed a little crazy.

That thought made me smile.

THE EPIC RACE

The weather was perfect.  The atmosphere was buzzing with excitement.  I have been asked several times if I was nervous, and generally speaking no, I really was not.  I knew that come what may, this was going to be a great day.

I was joined by 5 friends (most of whom were veterans of the SLO Mud Mash and other similar events) that were just as jazzed to take part in the mayhem.  I was specifically talked into it by my brother-in-law, Sean, who had a not so pleasant Tough Mudder experience last year in Snow Valley.  (Where it actually *snowed* on his race day....)  Since we weren't an actual team, I didn't expect to see most of them for the duration of the race.  However as it turns out both Sean and my friend Ben were all able to keep about the same pace up, so we stuck together.  I think their company made the distance seem very short, and I was undeniably grateful for their aid on a few of the obstacles.

Did I mention there was an obstacle *before* the Starting line? Yeah, just to make sure everyone is serious... so here is a pic of me on that wall, next to The Flash! :)

Last week I was a little disheartened because my planned training schedule had fallen short, since I got sick as a dog the second week of February and rolled my ankle slightly during trampoline dodge-ball on Valentines day.  I was feeling great race day morning, however, and had been chomping at the bit all week to get to that starting line.

The race is so popular 500 people leave in "waves" every 20 minutes.  There was an MC to entertain the folks for a little while before taking off, where you recite the Mudder Code and get pumped up with lots and lots of "Oorah!"  The philosophy and atmosphere make the race very unique, in that you feel very connected to the folks around you and you know that if anything were to happen, all the strangers around you would be at your side ready to help out.  the event is seen as a "challenge" instead of a "race" so time doesn't matter.  There are no chips to record your time and teamwork is highly encouraged.  There were costumes everywhere - I followed The Flash and Superman for the majority of the event; among other notable team names were "The Motorboaters," "Mudder Prison," "Team Trojan" (wearing red tutu skirts) and "Team Merkin: We Got It Covered."  Quintessential guys in Speedos, weird wigs, and I have to mention my teammate Ben running in "Jesus sandals."

My taste of TOUGH came immediately at the second obstacle, which was a low crawl under barbed wire fence.  Sean crawled under the obstacle like Spiderman, showing off his Army Strong training.  I tried pathetically to keep up with him using the inch worm strategy, and lifted my butt in the air just high enough to snag my pants on the very real barbed wire.  All it took was a light snag, and TA-DA! I was mooning everyone behind me.  My pants had a hole in them over my right butt check the size of the palm of my hand.
 

"Holy monkey... I'm on the first mile and I'm already wanting to quit since I don't want that hole to get any bigger..."  But oh, miracle of miracles! What was I given with my bib number at registration? (Sing the following with the "12 Days of Christmas" tune...) FOOOOOUR SAAAAFETY PIIIIINS!!  Praise!  I pinned myself together (two smallish holes were much better than one huge one) and kept on running.  (In the photo there you can kind of see the hole peeking out as I am jumping across giant muddy trenches in the ground.  Family and friends were gathered at certain obstacles to watch the crazies and cheer us on!)

I gingerly stepped around rocks in a dry river bed, climbed and rolled under logs, found some very narrow trenches, and then hit the first (and one of the worst) obstacles: crawling through dangling electric shock wires.

Mother Fraking Mudder, these things were crazy.  Saying they "hurt" isn't really the right term ... it's more like they punch you really hard.... like a really strong gnome is suddenly slamming his tiny rock hard fist into your body as fast and as hard as he can, and it somehow makes whatever muscle he touches spasm.  I got a really good one to the back that made me roar like a man, all the while volunteers are screaming over us  "Don't stop! Crawl faster and it will be better!"  But holy cow I'm just not a very fast crawler! Ben at my side kept yelling as I heard the snap, crackle, pop noises all in his general direction.  It was like my friend was getting tortured! (And he wasn't wearing a shirt... hmmm..)

Haha but somehow it was still fun ... I know, I know ... but it was!  More hills came after that, and more trenches, and daring leaps over giant muddy holes in the ground.  There are snarky signs posted all along the course to "motivate" you.  I took it easy on most of the uphills, saving my energy for whatever was around the next corner.  There was a giant ice bath that was alarmingly cold - it made my entire body feel like it was gasping for life, and once I was out the lingering tingle stayed with me for about another mile.  At least, until I got to the plunging tower, where you took a leap off a 20 foot platform into a giant muddy hole.  I have never had a problem with heights to I just went for it, and there was that little moment once I started falling that made me think "Oh my ... this is actually really high! Squeeeeee!!!"

There were some pretty big gaps after that which were flat or hilly and just for running.  I felt so good running, I think because it was something I was good at and there was nothing being slung my way.  It was a bit dusty, and the hills just never seemed to stop.

Little by little we made progress, and mile marker after mile marker kept us going.  We carried wood, we slogged through mushy lake crossings, we shimmied over water traps and balanced on 2x4's.


My favorite obstacle was probably the giant Slip N' Slide.  It had big bumps and a jerk with a fire hose who sprayed me in the face the entire way down.  I was grinning like an idiot as I slammed at who knows how many miles per hour into the giant pool at the bottom.  I wanted to turn around and do it 10 more times!  By then you could see the finish, hear the fun blaring music, and I was certainly ready to get the little pebbles out of my shoes, so I decided to keep going.  There was still a lake to swim in, and Everest to climb.  "Everest" is a big half pipe that you have to run up and either grab the edge on your own, or hope you have someone there to catch you and help you over.  I had been a little intimidated by the thought of this obstacle for a while, so I was incredibly grateful and happy that Ben and Sean were with me and I trusted them enough to not drop me on my face.  They both made it look so easy ... even Ben with his non-tread sandals!

Success on the first try!  (Thanks to the boys.)  Then it was on to the finale, and the most well known obstacle, the Electro Shock Therapy run.  If you have never seen any videos of these runs, you really should check it out, it's both horrific and hilarious.  Of all the people I invited to join us for the event, this was hands down the number one reason everyone gave for not wanting to come.  "Oh hell no, you guys are crazy" was probably the most popular line, followed by "Electric shocks? You PAY for this race?"  Yeah ... well... I mean... it's hard core! Right?

My Uncle went onto the website after I told him about it during Thanksgiving, and came back to me with wide eyes.  "Megan, have you actually seen the website for this event?"  Yes, I'm all signed up.  You kind of have to visit the website to sign up ...

Anyway, there were hay bails in the way, so it wasn't exactly a straight shot to the Finish, which you could actually see on the other end.  The folks who went in front of us all seemed to biff really bad... their backs or legs would get shocked and they would fall down hard, face first into the mud.  I guess a few people had even broken their arms earlier in the day!  It made it worse to just stand and watch, so once the coast was clear we all just took a deep breath.

My mantra was simple: DON'T FALL DOWN.

I got hit by one bomber hard in my left quad towards the end; felt the after effect of that for about an hour, but it didn't stop me. (Whew!)  Sean let out at least one banshee good scream and his body twisted towards me in a convulsion, but he made it through as well!

So, does everyone see Superman and The Flash standing behind us in the charge photo? Yeah, so the age old question of "Who would win a race? The Man of Steel or The Flash?"  The answer is, Megan, Sean, and Ben! Haha.  I think we finished in about 2 hours and 45 minutes.  The clock wasn't really anywhere obvious so that's just what I was told by our crowd of fans.  (Oh, and Bruno, my Muddy Buddy ...  finished nearly an HOUR ahead of us....animal!)

I'm already looking at signing up for another race in Las Vegas this October ... maybe even signing up to do both race days on Saturday and Sunday.  Double the fun!!  This more than any other event makes me truly believe that everyone is stronger than they think they are - don't run from an opportunity to surprise yourself, and never be afraid to look your fears in the face and grin right back at them!

Trampoline Dodgeball!!!!

So, when was the last time you did something that was "ridiculously awesome fun"???  

For Valentines a friend of mine organized a trip to SkyHigh Sports in Camarillo, a sports facility that is nothing short of a mega ninja hopping trampoline paradise!  I have been wanting to go to forever but had never bothered organizing anything.  There was a special 2-for-1 deal for couples, and I was stoked at the chance to play trampoline dodgeball.  I have to admit I had very high expectations as to how fun this would be, and my expectations were utterly blown away.  I had an absurdly good time.  We played for two hours (a whopping $20 per couple) and everything I was wearing was drenched!

The dodgeball pit was pretty simple, roughly 8 or so trampolines per side, squishy colorful kickballs being lobbed around, and a ref to make sure people weren't cheating too bad.  There were inevitably some little kids (and a couple guys that took the game waaaay too seriously) but all in all it was an excellent group.  I got nailed in the face a couple times ... that stung a little... I think they should use something more punishing for us next time...haha!

There were other pits in the area, one that was big and open and another one where you could jump into a huge pile of foam for a soft landing.  The foam was really hard to climb back out of, but it was fun to go flying into it!

BOYS!

LADIES!

In summary the evening was simply labeled a complete success.  I want to go back (as do most of us) for more.  They teach an "Airobics" class that I'm afraid I'm going to have to test out ASAP.

Floors, Part I: DESTROY!

We had an interesting weekend, actually turned out quite fun.  We have been wanting to tear out the nasty carpet in our condo for a long time (dog pittle stains? ew?), and it's finally happening!  Wood floors are coming in a few weeks, and in order to save a wee bit of monies we decided to tear everything out ourselves.  I honestly feel blessed by the coolest friends ever who are so eager to come and help out when stuff like this comes up.  It was hard work, but many hands made it go by so quickly!

Armed with all sorts of tools and breakfast burritos from a bakery down the street, the slave labor began bright and early.  There was quite a bit of tile downstairs, but SMASH! CRASH! Eddie and Chris were having a little too much fun... It seemed to be obliterated in seconds.  My ears were ringing for a while afterwards.  Then there was the carpet ... eeewww full of my nemesis, dust!  Nails, staples, glue, ick! We have some studly friends who smiled and grunted through the work and I could not have been more excited or grateful.

Not only did it take only one afternoon, we did more than we even expected.  All of downstairs, our staircase, and half of upstairs are all bare now.  The floors are LOUD when you walk on them, and the cats are totally flipping out.  New smells, nowhere to hide... Everything is covered in dust, but I think it will be more than worth it in the end.  (Plus maybe I'll actually finish "Dance with Dragons" finally this week!)

Thank you so much again to everyone who helped out ... it is very much appreciated. :)

My First Ever Pro Massage

**Note: This post is old.  I wrote it back in September, and totally forgot to publish it!

A little fact about myself you probably didn’t know: the idea of getting a massage gives me the heebie-jeebies.  (Scientific term.)

I think this feeling is largely due to my long private Christian school upbringing, in which a massage was more or less the equivalent (in my mind) of getting laid.  Okay, maybe not quite that, but it was certainly an over utilized tool in the game of tween seduction.  When a boy walked up behind you and gave you a neck massage, he was totally wishing he could tap that.  If a girl did the same to a guy, she was hustling for a homecoming date invitation.

So basically unless I am really attracted to the person, my first instinct when someone reaches for my shoulders is "Don't TOUCH meh."  (I had to really stifle this feeling when girlfriends did this to be sweet and I didn't want to hurt their feelings.  Awwwwwwwkward.)

After our long outrigger race in Oxnard I felt okay, but that night my back began to clench like an iron fist.  By Sunday morning, it took a long time for me to roll out of bed, and even walking around the house was a tedious and delicate task.  I armed myself with a heating pad, an ice pack, and watched an entire season of The Sons of Anarchy.  I felt better Monday, but “better” is a very relative term.  Sitting at my desk was a little torturous unless I kept perfect posture.  I needed something else, and a sports massage seemed to make the most logical sense.

I have thought about getting a massage before several times, and I have always chickened out of actually making an appointment.  Several friends have invited me along and volunteered to “show me the ropes” when it comes to massages, but I could never commit.  This time, however, it felt necessary, and I was willing to try anything – the pain was just too much.

To the internets I went, hunting down a massage therapist I would have the courage to see.  There are dozens of spas near my office, but visiting their websites gave me that gross feeling of being sent to an orgy farm.  Strangers touching me … girly smells … mindless salon style chatter… eeeeeeh … no thank you.  I needed to find a male, and I needed to not feel uber creeped out.

At long last I found a fellow with soaring praises from professional athletes who worked close to my office.  His site seemed very professional and serene.  I didn’t get that horrible creepy vibe and there wasn’t a statue of a fat bellied Buddha anywhere.  So, I dialed his number, and when he answered the phone I promptly hung up on him.  Oh, yes.  Full on, high school stalker style, hung up on the guy because I couldn’t muster up the courage to actually say anything.  Ridiculous.

It took me two more tries in the span of an hour to make a freaking appointment, and that only happened because my office chair was aggravating my back muscles so much.  Every time I picked up a file, I cringed and thought about how silly I am.

So, call I did.  I talked to the guy and made my appointment.  I penciled it into my calendar, I Googled his address.  Little did I know I was going to the guys personal residence.  Of course, of course I have to go to some stanger’s house without a bodyguard.

I had a mantra as I opened the gate.  “It won’t be creepy.  It won’t be creepy.  It won’t be creepy.”

As I opened the gate, a lush garden welcomed me, as well as an adorable curly haired doggy.  I relaxed a little.  The man came out to greet me.  He was short but muscled, dressed like a surfer beach bum.  There was pleasant music playing in the house as he lead me to the back where a separate shed sat.  It was like a little shrine with an oddly shaped bed.

The guy instructed me to undress, and he would be back in a few minutes.  Shutting the door behind him, feelings of panic returned.  How much do I take off? I wondered.  I had not thought to research that … do I get buck nekked?? If that’s not what you’re supposed to do, would he think I was a looney? If that is what you’re supposed to do and I keep my undies on, will he think I’m an utter prude?  I fretted over it for a long time but finally settled with panties on, bra off.  I tucked myself gingerly beneath the covers and let the serene silence take over.

I wasn't sure how to say This is my first time without it sounding ridiculous, so I decided he could do all the talking.

He came back and proceeded to grease me up, talking pleasantly about the weather, what sports I do, why I was there, and what my body was telling me.  Turns out several of his clients were outrigger paddlers, so he was familiar with the sport as well as the upcoming Catalina race.  His hands were disturbingly strong, I had to clench my teeth several times to keep screams of pain inside my throat.  It was also a little alarming to think, If I had to fight this guy for some reason in an attempt to escape, I bet I'd be pretty beat up in the process.

It took a while, and there were lots of "whooooa there..." moments, but I made it through.  He gave me some of his cards and told me to come back after the Catalina race.  I don't think I will ... but I'll keep him in mind.

TIP: No one told me you had to plan a shower after these encounters.  Back to work I went, greasy and gross.  Thankfully no clients showed up, and I did feel more relaxed.

Mission accomplished.

Runners Bliss

No matter where I have lived, there is always somewhere fun to go for a run nearby.  Granted, I have never taken up residence in the busy inner city - I think that would be the most challenging location.  I am also grateful beyond words that a "harsh winter" is non-existent around these parts.

There are days where I can almost literally hear the road calling me.  My legs feels anxious at rest.  My shoes dance for me slightly with excitement.  Are we going out today? Where? For how long?  I enjoy not knowing.  I also recently have been remembering how much fun it is to explore new routes.  Living in the same place for a while gets me rutted in old habits quicker than I like to think about.  I had three loops around Carpinteria that I would usually take, which I simply called my long loop, my short loop, and my scenic loop.  I would splash in a little variety here and there, but for the most part those were my usual paths.

Tee hee! Dolphins on the ranch gate!

Yesterday, feeling adventurous, I went in the complete opposite direction as my usual course.  I dared a beautiful mountain road that lead me sailing over hilly roads past farms and ranches, eventually finding the local polo club and a bit beyond.  It was exhilarating and fun, not to mention beautiful.  I also have to admit that having a phone that takes pictures which instantly upload themselves online is awesome.  I couldn't locate my trusty iPod before my trip, so I decided to try radio via my newly acquired hand-me-down Droid.  It worked nicely, and I was able to snap photos on a whim.  Pretty cool!

Mountains on one side, beach on the other.  Surrounded by happy!

Protesters!

So, one of the attorneys in my office is part of this big labor dispute and there are actually people outside our office today PICKETING him!! We went out as a big group and took a picture.  So funny!!!!  (Sadly the attorney himself is not in the office today so he was not able to protest himself.)  Smile for the camera!  The folks out there were really nice about it, I think they were highly entertained that our entire building emptied for the event.